Self- Care is NOT Selfish!
For the longest time (and still now, if I'm being honest), I thought taking time for myself was selfish. After all, I have a husband and a family to take care of, I shouldn’t need to worry about myself to…right? WRONG! and it took a pandemic and almost a mental breakdown for me to see that. Taking care of yourself is actually the complete opposite of selfish, because without taking care of myself, I am no good to anyone. I used to think that as long as I was running around to school, dance, gymnastics, tennis, etc I was being a good mom. And because I was cooking, cleaning, packing lunches, etc that I was being a good wife. I should be able to bring my BEST self into each day, and that isn't going to happen if I’m exhausted from all of the things I just listed. It is OK to take time away from family. It is OK to need 5 minutes to yourself each day. It is OK to take time for YOU.
In 2021, I have really been trying to work on taking the time to take care of myself. It is important for me to take care of me, so I can take care of everyone else. So I decided to give you 2 cents on self-care for busy moms! Keep reminding yourself that self care is NOT selfish! Here are 9 ways you can practice self care and be UNSELFISH!
Unwind- take time to sit on the couch and watch TV, read a book, have a healthy snack, whatever it is that brings you back to your center. For me, it’s usually reading a book. One of my goals has been to read at least 1 book per month this year. I also find that making goals helps me stick to things a bit more.
New things- Trying something new can be fun and exciting. Don’t miss out on new opportunities because you are halfway between dinner and dance class. My husband and I are going to try the ropes coarse that is near our town. Heights are NOT my thing, but I am willing to give it a try. (Also, this is helping us spend time together too- added bonus!)
Skills- What are some things you like/love to do? For some, like myself, cooking is somewhat therapeutic (when you aren’t tripping over children of course). Maybe painting/drawing, or sports are more your thing. Take time to refocus on the skills you have that you use to enjoy…start enjoying them again. Go to a paint night with your friends or go play basketball at the park, remind yourself of what you enjoy and do it!
Exercise- staying active is an overall indicator of having a healthy lifestyle, so don’t think of exercise as a book camp workout everyday. Exercise can be a walk outside or swimming in the pool, any movement that helps make you feel refreshed.
Love yourself- now you’re probably thinking -duh thats what this is all about! Well yes, but in this case I am referring to taking time for a spa day. Get a massage, relax in the sauna, clear your mind and take care of your body. Whatever this may look like for you (for me is a day at the spa- massage, facial, mani/pedi) spend the whole time on you- no interruptions!
Friends- no one ways self care has to be alone :-) Socialization is a huge part of your mindset and sometimes (esp. if you are like me) you need to surround yourself with others. Go out and have a girls night or if you prefer more of a party-like atmosphere, have people over for a potluck style dinner.
Intelligence- give your brain a boost. Sometimes people forget that your brain is a muscle, and it needs to be used to stay strong. Read a book, work on a puzzle, write in your journal, color, etc. All of these are great ways to exercise your brain.
Silly- never underestimate the power of a good dance party in the kitchen or karaoke session in the shower. Allow yourself a chance to let loose and be silly every once in a while. Or if that makes you feel a bit uncomfortable, host a game night with friends and kill two birds with one stone.
Have a plan- this is the hardest one for me. Make a plan! I am a very type A person, I like my lists and schedules, etc. I have realized that if I don’t plan for myself, I won’t take time for myself. So I have started to plan my self care…it may sound silly, but sometimes if you don’t think about it then days, weeks, months, will go by and you won’t even realize you are getting burnt out because there hasn’t been any times to care for yourself.
In a nutshell, I am by no means an expert in self care, I am just a busy mom who got a really big wake up call. You are not a superhero, and by no means should you try to be. I promise, if you make that spa day appointment, or if you go out for dinner with friends, your children and husband will still be there when you get back. And they will still love you…you are the best thing that’s happened to them…take care of yourself for them.